Today’s question: How do you deal with an atheist in your family?

 By listening and loving them. We’re called to love God and our neighbor as ourself. Almost every atheist I’ve met are incredibly committed to the “love neighbor” part.

My mom recently shared a post on Facebook. I’m still thinking about it. It is a parable for how we are: “A man went to church. He forgot to switch of his phone and it rang during prayer. The pastor scolded him. The church admonished him. His wife lectured him on his way home. One could see the shame, embarrassment, and humiliation on his face. He never set foot in the church again.

“That evening he went to a bar. He was still nervous and trembling. He spilled his drink. The waiter apologized and cleaned it up. The manager gave him a complimentary drink and a hug saying, ‘Don’t worry man. Who doesn’t make mistakes?’

“Lesson: sometimes our attitude as believers drives souls away from God. You can make a difference by how you treat people especially when they make mistakes.”

I have an atheist in the family. And many of my friends. They know I’m a pastor and believe that the cosmic force that created everything speaks to me. They don’t. Yet the god they don’t believe in, I don’t believe in either. The petty one who has a list and is checking it twice. The sky guy with a beard and a wrathful disposition. I love my atheist friends and family because they aren’t trying to convert me nor I them. No strings attached to our love. And they make me think about what I believe and what I value.

I want to lead a church that acts more like the bar in the parable above. And I mourn that when many people think of church they think of shame and guilt. How about we fix that?