This isn’t a sermon so much as a confession and a love letter to you, church. And it begins with this confession….

Now the tax collectors and sinners were all gathering around to hear Jesus. But the Pharisees and the teachers of the law muttered, “This man welcomes sinners and eats with them.”

It’s good to know who you are in each scripture reading. Some of us might feel like we’re the tax collectors and sinners. We carry labels that aren’t welcome in traditional religious settings or the wider culture. That’s why we’re here. We have come to hear Jesus’ words of welcome, and his teachings of grace.

I am often with the mutterers.

My family and I went on a cruise this past summer. Man, I was so judgmental. Internally. There was this dude… He was very noticeable. Loud dude at the pool. At the Belly Flop competition, he was listed at 300 pounds. He was brave enough to be in the competition, I was not. He was at the pool morning, noon, and night. Beer in hand. LOUD. I was internally muttering at that dude.

My therapist asked me, when I confessed I didn’t like how judgy I was, “What’s the most generous interpretation we could give that guy?” Don’t you just love great questions like that?

He was always around his family. He seemed to be having a great time with them. I walked off the ship near him and he was just as pale as he walked on even though he was out in the blazing sun all day. He has reddish hair, so he’d burn easily. Now I’m wondering how he did it. What sunscreen did he use?!

I was so busy judging (and being a tad-bit jealous that he bought the drink package and the cruise line seemed to be losing money on the deal) that I missed this child of God right in front of me. That’s why Jesus hurls parables at the religious mutterers. We read two today.

A sheep is lost. The unusually perceptive shepherd notices one of the 100 is missing. So they search, find, and celebrate. Or a woman loses a coin of great value. She sweeps the house, finds it, and celebrates with her friends. In the same way, Jesus says, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents. There is one more parable, and it’s the parable of the Prodigal Son. Same idea. A son is lost and returns. The father finds and celebrates. Yet the older brother is outside the party muttering.

I’m an older brother. I’m religious. I tend to mutter and judge. Mostly at myself, but sometimes directed toward others. I would like to think I would never get lost. But I can get lost in my own self-righteousness. I can get lost in my need to prove that I’m good—because my biggest fear is, what if I’m not good? What if I’m not worthy of love?[1]

Love, I think, must be earned. My value must be proven. I want to be useful and know stuff and give you amazing sermons and great advice for your life. But Jesus is teaching us that we don’t have to earn love or value. We already have it. We are like a sheep. A coin. A child of God. In telling these stories about why he’s hanging out with sinners and tax-collectors, he’s also telling the religious that they’ve lost the plot as well. God loves all. God is love. There is nothing you can do to earn this love.

I’m worthy of love now. I’m beloved without any reform, confession, or even without lifting a finger. Do you know who taught me that kind of religion? You, church.

The United Church of Christ showed me how lost I was. Yes, the world is chaotic. Yes, there are all sorts of people in it. Yes, there is a lot to be improved. But love can’t be earned. God’s love just is. And it extends to all the people I was raised to fear: Black and brown folk, LGBTQ+ people, and more.

I was raised in a tradition where only men could preach and preside over the sacraments. It was amazing to be mentored by the Rev. Nancy Dahlberg. Her lessons and love still echo in my life to this day.

You loved me into being church. Your historic witness. I didn’t know there were Christians like you in the world. I love how bad you are at marketing yourselves. You’re not doing this for accolades. You’re doing this quiet work because Jesus said to be humble. You trust that all who seek communities like ours will find, because Jesus said, “All who seek will find. Knock, and it will be opened for you.”

I love that about us. I love your heart for all people. I love your generous interpretation of the Gospels and the teachings of Christ. It’s rooted in good scholarship. Our faith is 2,000 years old, but our thinking is not. There’s no divide between faith and science. We can do both.

I just love being here. You have taught me so much. You’re helping with my impulse to self-improve. You’re helping me turn judgment into curiosity. To be less angry. More hopeful. More rooted in love and grace.

I love how the UCC is like an ADD octopus—our arms are in everything, moving in every direction at once. At first it can feel bewildering, but there’s a deep peace in knowing that if there is a human need, somewhere in our denomination a congregation is working on it. That’s why we’ve been called the “church of firsts.”

Take Salem, Massachusetts. The churches there saw firsthand what happens when a community falls into mistrust, false evidence, and sham trials. Women were harmed. One of the judges, Samuel Sewall, later stood in shame and publicly repented in 1697 for his role.[2] A few years later, in 1700, he authored one of the earliest anti-slavery tracts published in New England (The Selling of Joseph).[3] While these developments didn’t immediately reform judicial processes, they reflected a profound moral reckoning: true freedom must extend to all.

This thread continued in the fight for women’s right to vote. The risen Christ first appeared to Mary, and she was the first to give testimony of the resurrection. So of course women can be preachers and presiders at the sacraments. We were the first to ordain women. True freedom must extend to all.

We were the first denomination to ordain an openly gay man. We have fought for marriage equality. I love the radical openness here.

When I was in CPE, I once had a patient who had been in a terrible crash. I tried to contact his family, but no one could be found. About an hour later, a man arrived asking about the patient. I told him, “I can say he’s here, but I can’t share anything unless you’re family.” The man said he wasn’t. I explained, “Then there’s nothing I can do.” He paused and asked quietly, “Would it make any difference if I were his husband?”

This was before marriage equality was legal in all 50 states. And in that moment, I thought, If this were Kate… I’d want to be there. I’d want to be holding her hand, praying at her side. That’s when it hit me again: true freedom must extend to all. I took him back immediately, break hospital policy.

This is what I love about the United Church of Christ. Again and again, we have embodied what content creator Madi Webb says so powerfully: “If you think you care about freedom but you don’t care if it applies to everyone, what you really care about is privilege.”

You have been the first in so many ways, church. I love you as you are. I am committed. Ruined for life. Thank you for being you. Thank you for teaching me about grace.

So many of us are caught in transactional grace: If I do this, then God will love me. If I believe, then I’m forgiven. If I’m 100% committed to the Spiritual Disciplines, if I read my Bible every day, if I volunteer at every single place here… then I will be worthy of love.

Beloved… you’re already loved. The hardest and most impossible aspect of our faith is accepting you’re accepted. Without you having to do anything. You are loved by Love with a capital L. No matter what. For Romans 8 says, “…that nothing in all of creation will be able to separate us from the love of God found in Christ Jesus.”

That is a balm to my soul that is always trying to prove itself. To be right! Yet a part of me knows I learn best when I’m wrong. Of course I’m a work in progress.

Now we’ve come to the part of the sermon where we can vote. Since the motion comes from staff, we don’t need a second. The motion is that we can skip this next part of the sermon and go right to the end…. Or we can get into some deeper theology. What say you church?[4]

Church, you have taught me that much of my view of God wasn’t Trinitarian. It was pagan. Theologian Richard Rohr uses the label “pagan” to describe the popular, un-mystical understanding of God, which he sees as restrictive and unloving.

A “male monarch on a throne”: God as a powerful, remote authority who rewards and punishes. This is a Transactional and punitive: easily angered, requiring rituals for appeasement. This god is stingy and domesticated: God’s presence limited to shrines and churches, captured and tamed. This theology is dualistic: separating holy and profane in ways that distort the true nature of Christ; good guys and bad guys, and not the mixed bag that we actually are.

Rohr contrasts this with an expansive, incarnational spirituality that re-embeds the divine within all creation. His work is a call to move beyond a fear-based, transactional relationship with a distant god toward a direct, intimate, and unitive experience of the divine presence within and around us.[5]

God loves us and is with us. Without us having to ask. Without any demands—only invitation. You are valued and you have value. Nothing God has made is worthless.

You have provided that for me. For my family. And for countless others. God is with us AND STILL SPEAKING. This is good news. It means salvation is ours today. And it is made new each and every day. And this is liberation from all that binds us.

Thank you, church. From the bottom of my heart. Thank you. Church is good. Friends are amazing. Both are examples of the grace of God unasked for, that I can’t repay. Amazing stuff. Thanks be to God. Amen.

Works Cited

[1] This is the core fear of Enneagram Type 1s. For more info on the Enneagram, check out this free course: https://chhsm.thinkific.com/courses/enneagram

[2] Caldwell, Quinn. “In Praise of Guilt and Shame.” 2014 Calmly Plotting UCC Lent Devotionals. Page 31.

[3] https://www.ucc.org/ucc-firsts

[4] Both 9 and 10:30 services voted to go into the deep theology. Another thing I love about the UCC is how we vote on everything.

[5] https://robbell.podbean.com/e/episode-86-richard-rohr-and-the-alternative-orthodoxy/